A few days ago, I was reading books a lot to help the dull hours pass
by. I wasn't reading the usual books I always read. I had been feeling ( I don't wanna say depressed because it's such a strong word) overwhelmed of all the things happening in my life. One book I read had a section that really hit me. I read it over and
over, contemplating what it meant in my own life. I don't even recall
the title of the book, because overall, it was not even worthy of
remembering. But I did jot down this one paragraph from the book that
left an impact on me.
"All women compare lives. We are aware of whose husband works more,
whose helps more around the house, whose makes more money, whose is more
romantic. We compare our children, taking note of who is sleeping
through the night, eating their vegetables, minding their manners,
getting better grades in school. We know who keeps the best house,
throws the best parties, cooks the best meals, has the best tennis game.
We know who among us is the smartest, has the fewest lines around her
eyes, has the best figure. We are aware of who works full-time, who
stays at home with the kids, who manages to do it all and make it look
easy, who shops and lunches while the nanny does it all. We digest it
all and then discuss it with our friends. Comparing and then confiding;
this is what women do. The difference lies in why we do it. Are we doing
it to gauge our own life and reassure ourselves that we fall within the
realm of normal? Or are we being competitive, relishing others'
shortcomings so that we can win, if only by default?"
To some extent, this can be acceptable behavior. In comparing myself to
others, I see the strengths in others and I admire them greatly, whether
they be talents, abilities, or physical features. God has blessed us
all with unique gifts, and I can recognize and appreciate those gifts in
so many people.
But, this behavior can also have a very negative impact. When others
compare and confide, AKA gossip, they acknowledge the shortcomings of
others and they make themselves feel superior. In essence, they are
hurting others in order to feel supreme, which has a harmful effect on
themselves as well. Even though I've stopped participating in this, I
still compare.
I want to be able to recognize the strengths that others have without
feeling and allowing negative criticism towards myself for the
weaknesses I have in those same areas. I want to be able to get to the
point where I can recognize my own strengths and acknowledge the
strengths of others, and realize and understand that god intended for
each of us to have certain strengths and certain weaknesses. Because if I
didn't have any weaknesses, I wouldn't need the help of others who had
certain strengths that are unlike mine. Because if I truly had the BEST
parts of all those people, I would have no need or desire for change or
improvement. Because without my weaknesses, I would have no reason to
feel humble. And without the need or desire to change and improve my
life.How I love the power of books, they do make you think ;)
